Being normal, and other lies
by Writingisfunlol
Summary: With Dexters secret out of the bag, Deb reveals her deepest darkest secret. Her feelings for her brother. The hunt for Miami's most resent murderer will make Dexter take a look at his life and the worth of it all. What is normal for Dexter Morgan?
1. Lovely

Welcome and enjoy! I could no longer hold back on writing something like this.. seeing as they will deny us of it until season 8. Here you go. Comment cuz it's fun.

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**Lovely**

"_Did you hear me? I love you Dexter. I'm _in_ love with you."_

I can practically hear her heart beating. Like if she was holding it in her hands, displaying it for me. The most vulnerable I've ever seen her in her life. She's just standing there, trying not to cry, being the Deb I know and _love_. Ever so strong and yet so, see through. Staring at me. Questioning me. What can I say? This is not just any woman, she's Debra. My sister.. My..

_"Jesus Dex please say something? You know anything! Just... Please say something.."_

Her eyes start darting from my eyes to my lips. She's trembling, and she's hesitating. This unknown impulse rushes over me and out of nowhere her trembling lips are now mine.

Easy.

Like the _first_ time...

_"Deb have you ever been kissed?"_ She was young and sweet and ever so interesting to me.

_"Well duh duffus, I mean.. I am fourteen, Haven't you?" _

_"No."_

_"Why not?"_

_"I don't know, I don't get why anyone would want to. You know? "_

_"Well because, that's what you do when you like someone._ "

That was very vague for seventeen year old Dexter. I had leaned in to kiss her. Her tender soft lips, the only ones that up to that point in my life had looked seemingly appetizing.

Her lips were soft.

_"What the hell Dexter?!" _She had seemed more surprised then angry. She swiped her lips and pushed me.

"_I'm sorry! Sorry Deb! You said.."_

"_But I'm your sister dumbass. You can't kiss me." _

I must have looked pretty confused because she had leaned in close to me and held my hand.

_"Dex.. Lets not tell mom and dad about this ok?" _

I hadn't. I'd told him I'd kissed a girl before, but not Deb. he'd never know about that little mistake. Normal people don't kiss their sisters...

She moaned as her lips left mine for the fraction of a second I had stopped to reminisce. She tasted like tears now.

I held her head in my hands, a few inches away from mine. Her big teary eyes looked at me, _into_ me. What did she want from me?

_"Deb this is.. you're my sister."_

They were her words. Her excuse. Not mine.

She exhaled. Relieved? Frustrated? This is new territory I'm standing in. Nothing in Harry's code could have ever prepared me for this. Not that Harry might have ever approved of this. _This_? What is this?

Her arms wrapped around me as she dug her face in my chest and cried. Sobbed, like if something had broken deep inside her, like when I had saved her from Brian, like when Lundy had died. That kind of crying that sweeps through her in waves, leaving me completely and utterly impotent. Unable to chase away her demons. Unable to calm her. Her embrace tightened around me and I could feel her shake.

_"I have fought against this Dex, I really really have. But I can't.. I love you. All of you. I have no fucking clue what to do about it, it's like it eats at me."_

She feigns a laugh and pulls away from me and I feel empty for some reason. I feel cold.

She sits on the bed and begins to play with her hands, a nervous habit I know too well.

_"You don't have to say that you love me back, or promise me anything crazy or stupid. I just really needed you to know that. I really could not live, if you didn't know that."_

We stay in silence. A silence we've shared for so long that it's familiar and comforting. Only now it isn't. Now it's tinted with unsaid feelings and this need for _more_. More from her. More from me.

I'm lost. Anything and everything I had ever set up as guidelines, rules as to how to behave around Deb. What were they for? She had taught me. Brothers don't kiss their sisters. I'm sure as hell sisters should not fall in love with their brothers. We're no ordinary family though. We're pretty messed up, thanks to dear old dad.

When we were young I hadn't questioned it. She was my sister and Harry was my father, my mentor. My whole life I've protected her. My main job has been to protect her, from me. Now that she knows and she chooses to love me. Why deny myself the pleasure of rejoicing in it. Why not comfort her, the way she wants.

Because she deserves better, that's why.

_"I'm no good for you Deb."_

_"Fuck that Dexter, that is not for you to decide."_

I can't say I didn't try. I kneeled in front of her and her still shaking frame. Was I scaring her? I took her head between my hands again, she looked at me. Relieved. I was accepting her. _Her_ dark passenger. I put my forehead against hers and we both sighed. Like this was natural, _normal_. Her hands lay on my shoulders and slowly massaged circles at the base of my neck as our minds dumped years of rules out. Rules, rules, rules. we've both been slaves to them for too long.

I can feel the warmth of her breath as she gets closer. Sure of herself, of her love for me. For this dark beast. My teeth catch her sweet, soft lower lip and I suck on it gently. Roughly but gently, she exhales. Acceptance.

Her lips crash onto mine almost as if she feared for dear life that I'd let go, that I'd pull away at any moment. Her hands took my neck prisoner and kept me close. But I'm not going anywhere.

I don't understand love. but I know need. The need to satisfy urges, _to please_. Those are easy. It's what makes us all beasts. Animals. I want to push her down on the bed. Pull that blouse off and observe. Just watch her breath, but I can't. She beats me to it. Her hands rush my shirt off, and her hands explore and caress my torso. She's fast. I don't like it. I've waited too long to rush this. I lay her down and trail rough kisses down her neck. I can feel her pulse quicken there. Her jugular. I take a bite at it and she moans. It sounds great, she really likes it. And I have an urge to please. Her hands begin to loosen buttons off her shirt and it quickly comes off. This is such a new side of Deb. It's such a beautiful side. I pull away and stare for a moment. She shivers at the loss of contact and her eyes look down as if to hide from mine. I lay our chests together and she looks up at me. All I can see in there is the animal. No hesitation. The warmth of her skin excites mine and a grunt accidentally leaves me. Her lips look for mine again and she attacks them hungrily. I can feel her hands run up and down my body, they are fast and motivated. She starts at my pants and I understand the need. I help her lower them.

No kill could ever compare to this. To having the forbidden fruit, the key to acceptance and release. I remember Hannah and I understand. I had wanted Deb all along. She wiggles out of her pants and her beautiful long legs wrap around me. This is it.

_"Go."_ she whispers near my ear.

Go. Escape, bury everything deep within her.

I go.

Her hurried breath echoing in my ear as I thrusted.

_"Jesus Debra."_

My arm wraps around her back and I hold her tight. My teeth grazing her earlobe. I can feel her move, the hurried swaying of need. Built up and tense. She's like a guitar, tightly strung to the point of breaking.

I drag myself lower onto her chest as my thrusts begin to lose their power. I feel close. So very close. I lay my head on her chest and the sound of her rapidly beating heart marks our pace. She begins to writhe beneath me, her nails digging into my scapula. Her body shakes and convulses until mine finally reaches it's climax. It feels so liberating. Like sex always does, but this time it's different. There was more. The feeling of _full_ release. Of coming full circle. Deb's arms wrap around my head and she kisses me. I can feel the smile on her face without even looking at her. It feels so clean, so normal. To let her hold me, to be with her like this. This vulnerable, naked Dexter. No longer Dexter, her lousy, no good brother. Or Dexter the Bay Harbor Butcher, but Dexter the man she loves.

Can I live up to the expectations? No time for questions now thought.

_"Who the fucks out there?"_ Deb asks leaning on her elbows.

There are voices in the living room.

_"Dexter! Dexter! Dexter! Surprise!"_


	2. X

**X**

Peace and quiet. You really learn to appreciate it when you know what it's like to try to sleep in a house with two teenagers and a toddler. The quiet hum of the centrifuge separating blood platelets from plasma, the silent dripping of solutions being diluted, and the smell of antiseptic formula. The silence, it's almost deafening. And yet so relaxing. The office sure feels like home right now.

Astor and Cody had decided to pay me a visit, apparently having Harrison over for a week wasn't long enough. They planned to stay the week at my house. They had sure scared the hell out of Deb that night though...

_"Who the fucks out there?"_

She had leaned on her elbows to hear the kids and Jamie coming. Once our intruders were identified she had stormed off the bed like a mini tornado, picking up and throwing clothes on.

_"Stop staring and move asshole, get up!"_ At least that hadn't changed.

_"Sorry we showed up unannounced Dexter, Harrison was just getting a little fussy. I though he might be missing you so we came home, Astor and Cody thought maybe they could come along too."_ Jamie handed me Harrison, who jumped into my arms and hugged me.

_"Hey little guy, did you miss daddy? That's fine Jamie it's no problem" _

Deb walked out of the room and awkwardly waved towards everyone. The only one who felt that way was her though, everyone else was too busy to realize how tense she was. I set Harrison down and he ran right at her and held on to her leg.

_"Hi buddy! I missed you."_ She picked him up and kissed him a couple of times. She tickled and smiled at him forgetting all about the situation we were dealing with.

_"Dexter, Dexter! Harrison can catch a ball now! It's so cool, look! watch!"_

Cody moved towards Harrison and showed him the ball. He is a lot taller now. Rita wasn't that tall so he must get that from Paul, I hope height is all he'll inherit from him though. And Astor, Astor looks so grown up, she probably has boys after her now. I guess I should start paying more attention to the company she keeps.

_"Shit Cody watch where you throw that damn ball."_ I laugh. She might have picked that up from Deb, she was around seventeen too when her potty mouth was born.

_"Hey, watch the language Astor!"_ Jamie chimed in while she moved around fixing things in the kitchen.

_"Hey aunt Deb are you staying for dinner?"_ Astor asked. Deb fidgeted. Reality settling back in her. Would she regret what had just happened?

_"I don't think so, I have to go um do work, do some work. Sorry kiddo."_

She'd kissed and hugged Harrison a couple more times before she said goodbye to everyone and left, her eyes never meeting mine. Oh boy, this was going to be strange.

I hadn't heard from her since then. I hadn't though of calling her, what's the protocol state you should do when you sleep with your foster sister?

I looked towards her office to try to meet her eyes like usually happens when there is stuff between us but she was reading something. Trying to read something. She finally gave it up and threw the pen on the desk before she sat back and massaged her temples. She seems just as confused as I am. There are no more rules, nothing to go on. Deb and I have always had a system. I'm her support, she would come to me for advice, to vent. Why hasn't she come? Maybe she was waiting on me.

I could do that. Make the next move. I made and attempt to walk towards her office but before I could get there Angel interrupted.

_"Hey Dex, murder on south west 24th terrace. Female, Lisa Perkins. Age 13. There's blood man, come on get your kit."_

Great. I guess Deb would have to wait.

It's not that I don't want to talk to Deb, this new dynamic in our relationship intrigues me, that she could love all of me. Be _in _love with me. I feel like I've always loved... at least cared for her. I can't really say that I know what love is, the idea of making someone your 'one and only' may be the only thing in the world that scares me. If I've learned anything at all is that people like me are incapable of love, and the ones that get to love me end up hurt, or dead. Look at what happened to Rita, to Hannah. I can't _love _Deb, but why do I genuinely feel the need to?

I pulled up on the driveway and walked passed all the officers, the neighborhood seems nice. Calm, friendly neighbors, picket fences. Where a respectable family would live.

The parents standing by the door are weeping. Comforting each other in their moment of loss. I usually don't take pleasure in the pain of mourning parents, but I appreciate the distraction.

_"She was such a sweet child! Why would anyone do this? Why! She'd never hurt anyone. God! My Lisa! My sweet baby" _The grieving mother held on to her husband.

Down the hall is the room where they'd watched their daughter grow, and where they had found her murdered. The room is organized. Nothing seems out of place, there are posters and pictures on the walls. Nothing looks disturbed, not even the child. Her hands angelically positioned by her head laying in bed surrounded by stuffed animal. She looked peaceful, laying there in a pool of her own blood.

_"So what do we have?"_

_"Mmm, some type of sedative was used. Maybe chloroform or injection, but there seems to be no point of entry to be seen, so most likely chloroform. She would have had to have been unconscious in order for the murderer to have positioned her." _At least he was considerate, she hadn't suffer. "_He stabbed her twice forming an X shape, in the skull. Right in the back, between her occipital and parietal bones. Died of blood loss."_

Her skin was pale, her blond hair drenched in viscous coagulated blood on her right side, where she had been laying all night, poor Lisa. Whoever did this, had wanted to preserve her innocence. He had made her look angelic, her small hands holding a small stuffed toy.

_"Search for prints, anything. The sick demented fuck who did this wont get away with it."_ Debs voice came in behind me, she was upset. The scene of the girl too hard to bare. She walked out, but I had felt her eyes on my back. She had directed that at me. I guess I've become something like the lieutenants new hit man.

As I walked out of the scene a boy down the hallway knocking the back of his head repeatedly onto the wall grabbed my attention. I was drawn to him.

_"Hey, hey stop that. What's wrong?"_ He's older than Lisa. Maybe sixteen. Blond. He's her brother.

_"I should have saved her. She shouldn't have died. She didn't deserve this. It's all my fault!"_ His head bashed the wall as he chanted, then he alternated the back of his head for his fist, once this one began to bleed his physical pain stopped him and he sat on the floor. "_She didn't deserve this_." He repeated.

_"Who could have wanted this? Do you know of anyone who might have wanted to hurt Li.._

_"If I knew he'd be dead now! He'd be dead do you hear." _I hear.

He's distraught.

_"Hey Dextrose, get over here!"_ Masuka calls me back to the crime scene before I can finish questioning the boy. I can only imagine what he is feeling. Many times before the thought of loosing Deb had kept me up at night, as a brother my job has always been to protect her. I understand his anger, his need to kill whoever did this. The need for justice.

_"Look at this, 'X marks the spot.' What do you think it means?"_ A small scrap of paper had been rolled up and stuffed into the stuffed animal. It was written in blood, Lisa's blood.

_"I, I don't know. It could be something she knew? Or maybe he put something in her head. We should check for that in the autopsy." 'X marks the spot' but what treasure was he looking to find?_

I continued to search the room but kept coming empty. Eventually the crime scene began emptying out. On my way out a picture on the mantel caught my attention. The kids and their father on a fishing trip. I had my own fond memories of fishing trips, but what attracted me was the fathers knife collection.

_"Lisa liked to fish."_ Speak of the devil. The head of the Perkins family sat down on the living room couch with a scotch, his eyes looking past the living room and into his memories, where his daughter still lived. _"She had such a great heart" _He took a sip of his drink and choked back some tears. _"And Michael loved her so much."_ He pointed at the boy in the picture holding his sisters catch of the day up for her, proudly smiling. A happy boy, nothing like the Michael that sat in the hallway now looking into his sisters empty room.

_"She was such a blessing you know? Michael is pretty hard to handle, teenage boys tend to be like that, but she just made him better. He really tried to make her proud of him, always"_ All I could do was nod. He looks shattered, but that doesn't mean he couldn't have killed his daughter.

_"I'm sorry for your loss mister Perkins."_ He nods as I let myself out of the house. Some people have it harder than others I guess. Michael would get his justice, as would Lisa. If the father was the killer I'd find out. I suppose If I really thought about it, I'll probably take him out myself. There is no need to feed the darkness in this boy. If he is as much trouble as Mr. Perkins says he is, it might not be good to tempt him. but now I need to see Debra. I want to let her know my suspicions on the father. That, and to hold her. You never know when you are going to loose your guiding light, and I just want to be near her.

As I got into the car my cell vibrated. _"Come to my house after work, please. -Deb."_

She'd read my mind._ "I'm on my way."_

* * *

This is going to be a full on season! :) lets call it **my** season 8. I've got my big bad and everything. Enjoy!


	3. Click

**Click**

Deb paces the living room, anxiously waiting. Jesus fuck, she'd been so stupid! Why hadn't she just called him after they'd... Or talked to him at the office. It made her angry, to be in this situation. She had definitely fucked herself into a corner now. I mean, there was no taking it back now, right? She had been wracking her brain all weekend trying to figure out what to do. Wondering why Dexter hadn't shown up at her door and talked to her, had he regretted it? Ughh fuck balls. These are the moments she would most likely run to Dex to, and ask him to reassure her that it would all be ok, but she couldn't now. Not with him being the problem. Well, not problem but. Ughh fuck.

She finally took a seat on the couch and massaged her temples. She had to unwind her thoughts, how did she expect Dexter to understand any of this is if she fucking couldn't? She loves him. Yes. There's no denying that. Being with him that night had been so... great, relieving actually. He had accepted her. He could have denied her, but he didn't, he could have. But instead he had kissed away her worries and taken her. Loved her, all of her. She smiled at the memory.

If only Harry could see them now.

_"Oh god."_ She grunted as she got up to answer the knock at the door.

_"Hey."_

Deb looks conflicted, I've seen that look before. The sad, apologetic smile that she wears when she wants to talk about something big but she's scared to burden me with the new information. I know her so well, and yet she has become so new to me. How long has she been in love with me? And why?

I can see her hesitating at the door, wanting to come closer and not really knowing where we stand. I guess this should be me making the first move. I reach out for her and hug her. She immediately reciprocates and I know she feels safe. I should have done this earlier, reassured her that we are still ok. Knowing Deb, the uncertainty was probably killing her.

_"I'm sorry I haven't come to you sooner Dex, I just... for the first time ever I have absolutely no one to go to, and I wanted to give you your space so that you could try to understand everything too."_ She pulls away and looks at me. _"I'm just so confused, you know?"_

_"I know."_ I nodded.

Her hand runs through her hair in frustration and she looks towards the floor, embarrassed.

_"It's just so fucked up Dex!" _

_"It's not! I don't think it is, at least it wouldn't be if you stopped calling it that." _She steps back and looks at me for a moment, evaluating my honesty. Checking, to see if I'm lying. I don't feel like I'm lying.

_"Deb, for as long as I can remember you have been there for me. I have been there for you. I will always protect you..."_

_"Jesus Dexter, we _fucked_. Please stop talking like my brother."_

_"This has nothing to do with being your brother. I would never want to hurt you. This is just another step for us Deb."_

She sat down on the sofa, her head between her hands. Wasn't that night what she had wanted? She had poured her heart out to me. Taken Deb, _my sister_ and locked her out of the room as Debra Morgan, this new woman sucked and bit at my lips. That woman was a different person than my sister, where was she now? Probably drowning in Debs guilt ridden subconscious fighting to get out, to become the driver instead of just an impotent, suppressed dark passenger.

_"I'm not your brother Deb. Not really anyway"_ My words seem to relax her, ease her shame.

_"If you want to forget what happened, that's..."_

_"I don't."_ The woman replies.

_"I just want you to know that I'm ok with whatever you choose."_

Dexter, the loving brother speaks up, giving her an escape route if she needs it. I can't manipulate her emotions for me. I can't be that dark.

I reach for her hand and it lays in mine. She watches them intertwine on her lap and smiles. I make her happy.

_"What do you think dad would have said about this?"_

Her expression clouded again, as her thumb drew circles on my palm. It's incredible how Harry could haunt us both so long after his death. He'd broken us. If he had maybe paid more attention to Deb growing up she would have never fallen for a monster. He'd wasted precious time playing and denied Deb the love she deserved.

_"He'd be disgusted. You deserve so much more."_

Debra had always been the perfect child. She was smart and loyal, innocent and naive. All our childhood she would chase after me in search of attention - from Harry. Had he perhaps shown her what love was she wouldn't accept so little. She wouldn't accept me. But Harry had failed as a father, and so now, here we sit. The perfect daughter neglected, and broken beyond repair with the monster Harry had tirelessly worked upon our whole lives to create.

She shook her head and looked at me in disbelief before she kissed me. Hard, like before, trying to make me take the words back. Her hands made their way to my chest where she held on for support as she maneuvered herself above me, straddling me between her legs. Her hard kiss became calm, elongated pecks, on my cheeks and neck before she hugged me tight and dug her face under my chin.

_"Fuck you Dex. Don't ever say shit like that again. Do you hear me? I don't need 'much more' I just want _you_ ok?"_

She pulled back momentarily to look at me, and to talk with her hands like she so often did when she got passionate about her conversation._ "I mean, god! Who else would put up with all my shit but you? You're the only one that knows me, that gets me Dex. Don't _ever_ put yourself down like that. I wont fucking allow it. "_

_"Okay."_ I replied, not really knowing what to say.

She looked at me. Into me, and smiled before she kissed me again. This time it was soft, and gentle. She drew it out, playing with our lips. With the sensation of making time stop just for us. She was certain now, that I understood. That I wouldn't leave, or jump once her lips left mine. I raised my unresponsive hands off the couch willing them to rest on her legs, and slowly inch their way up her waist where I wrapped my arms around her. There I held her against me, reveling in the sensation of being accepted. She pulled at my lip with her teeth and laughed, holding her forehead against mine.

_"We're some sick fucks Dex." _

_"Stop saying that!"_ I smiled, allowing myself to play with her. I pulled her in closer and kissed her jaw. She ended up hugging me again, resting her head on my shoulder. She sighed.

_"You're right, it's not that bad." _Atta girl, I'd always been good at comforting her. Her head popped up and she got right back to business. _"I'm glad all this awkward shit is done though, cuz now we can get down to finding one real sick fuck. Did you find anything at the Perkins?" _Atta girl.

* * *

_"Astor don't wonder off ok? I'll be right back, I just have to get this shirt off of Harrison, he got ice cream all over himself. Didn't you silly?"_ The small blond child giggled in the nannies arms as the younger girl rolled her eyes.

_"Fine. God Jamie, I'm not 10. I'll be fine."_

No sooner had they left Astor pulled out her phone and began to look through her pictures. It was going to be hard to go back to Orlando. The pictures were just memories now of how happy he had made her. Jesse, ugh what a stupid name. She flipped passed the images, unconsciously mumbling profanities under her breath till the waiters laugh interrupted her thoughts.

_"Sorry, are you done with that?"_ He smiled, pointing at the empty plates on the table.

_"Yea, go ahead."_ He reached over for the plates and shook his head smiling. _"Do you mind telling me what you find so funny?"_ She said, annoyed at his cheesy grin and careless attitude.

_"Nothing really, I just have never heard such a pretty girl cuss like that."_

_"What the hell do you care?"_

_"I don't. See you around Astor."_ She wasn't surprised that he knew her name. She had been doodling it on the napkin he had just picked up off the table, he had actually read it off of there.

He walked away with the plates and she shook her head in disbelief. What was wrong with the way she talked? Shit, everyone should be more damn honest when they talked. Plus she was angry, fucking sue her. She continued to angrily flip through the images, this time deleting them as she watched through her peripherals at how the cute waiter saved her napkin in his pocket.

"He's all clean!" Jamie chimed in kissing a clean Harrison as they made their way back to the table.

_"All good Astor?"_ Astor nodded. Watching as the waiter took off his apron and left for his break.

* * *

_"Morgan? Astor Morgan? I didn't know Debra had a daughter." _

_"Well I don't know, I mean she could be Dexters"_

_"Dexter! I had completely forgotten about him!"_

_"You had? That's weird, cuz you mention him a fuck of a lot."_

_"Oh shut up you little shit, I had. I thought he only had a son."_

_"Whatever, well at least she's not Debra's, isn't that the important part?_

_"Hmm yea I guess you're right."_

* * *

Well hello there one and all, forgive my delay in posting a new chapter. To make up for it I will try to be back this weekend with spanking nother one for you all. All my new characters are coming to life pretty nicely in my head :) Happy readings!

BTW recommending "Fingerprints in the dark" That story was beautiful, for all of you who like angst-y Deb/Dex from the teen years. It was really good. I can only hope to get as good as that writer.


	4. Yesterday is Today

**Yesterday is Today**

She loves me. She _wants_ me. It's still a little hard to believe. I guess my relationship with Deb has always taken a backseat due to my more deep seeded urges.

Hard as I try to remember, her teen years seem like a blur to me. Except, for when she started dating. The men that walked into her adolescent life had always made me stop and look. There was something interesting in her choice of men. There had been Patrick Craig, him I remember well. You could say he was my 'friend' He followed me incessantly like Deb use to, I guess they found company in that. Eventually it ended, like all the others. Eric Winer, Todd Limber, Matthew Carrigan. All the same and yet different, all with something new to show her, but they'd never kept her attention for long. None had ever been able to fill that void in Debra, that empty space that had her crawling into my room most nights to sleep on the floor. She probably thought I never noticed, she used to sneak out before sunrise, but there were nights when she would often talk in her sleep, and sometimes I'd listen. I've always been a light sleeper.

Deb moved in my arms, mumbling something in her dreams. We had talked about the Perkins case for hours before I left her house to see the kids. She had decided to rule the father out as a suspect since his alibi had been cleared for the time of murder. He works the night shifts as a security guard and had not left his post all night. We had both agreed that the brother was in need of questioning, and a later thought of decision to investigate into Lisa Perkins school life had Deb running over to my house for dinner.

Jamie had left for the night and after the kids had gone to bed, Deb decided to relive her teenage escapades and sneak into my room, but this time it was nothing like the old days, and the rug by my bed was far from her final destination.

She had jumped into my bed and quickly stripped off her T-shirt and boxers. She was playful, and beautiful as she wormed her way under the covers and above me. Her long legs, and arms wrapped around me as she attempted to wrestle me like she used to when we were children, only now her goal was to undress me. When we were small I used to untangle myself from her and leave her disappointed, and defeated on the floor. Always too small and too week to defeat big brother Dexter. Now I made up for it and held her closer, making her attempts close to impossible. I'd slow her down with with kisses, and bites, but she squirmed and bit her way out of my arms. Her naked form pressed against me fought for equality, as awkwardly my clothes began to come off. She laughed as my shirt slipped off my head. I could feel her warm flesh grace mine as she slid up and down the bed, pulling the rest of my clothes down with her. Her mouth and mine fought for the right of exploration and that which had begun as games had turned to foreplay. I found myself using my mouth as a form of noise control. Deb would whimper and moan as my fingers found new places previously missed by the rush of the first time. I had to stop. There would be no waking up the dead tonight, not with the kids so close. I bit her collar bone and made her laugh, she gently slapped me and searched for my lips in the darkness.

"_We have to stop Deb. The kids._" I reminded her wishing I didn't have to. My own lungs rushing in need of air.

"_Fuck Dex, now?_" She whined but she exhaled defeated, her fingers combed through my hair and I felt the need to kiss her apologetically.

"_Sorry._" My lips made their way up from her sternum to her forehead. She didn't answer but her body curled automatically into my arms.

We tried to ease into sleep, laughter and frustration still lingering in the air. I could see her smile in the faint light of the room as she traced shapes on my chest. I like her smile, and knowing that I am the one putting it there, but more surprisingly I find that the effect is mutual.

I could feel her stir as the sun began to rise, her wondering hand gliding from my chest to my..

"_Good morning_" She grinned, eyes still closed. Content with her hands discovery and the control she could wield over me so early in the morning. I laughed, I've become very fond of this new Debra. "_Three more days right? Kids go back to Orlando._" She laughed as well, throwing her silky long leg over me.

"_Three more days._" I smiled as I kissed her grinning lips, then grunted. She was awfully tempting.

As if on cue, Harrison called out for me through his baby monitor. "_Dada._" Astor and Cody would be getting up soon too.

"_Oh boy, I guess the day has begun._" Deb mumbled into my neck before she kissed me and hopped off. She threw on her clothes from the night before and walked out of the room. Her voice came back in through the baby monitor as she greeted Harrison, his laugh came in too as she probably tickled him. I couldn't help but smile. She had been there all along.

"_I guess it has_." I told myself.

* * *

_"Michael? Dear, come out please!" _Janet Perkins patience is wearing thin. It has been two days since her daughters tragic death and her son still refuses to come out of his room. She's heard things hit the wall and every now and then she could hear her son scream. It was breaking her heart. Wilson, her husband was a quiet man. He was crying on the inside and he was of no help to her, no help to anyone really. She keeps wondering if it will get easier at some point, and tears spill down her cheeks every time she realizes her daughter is gone and nothing will ever be the same. She tries knocking again.

_"Sweetheart, the police department wants to speak with you today. You can help them find whoever did this. But you need to come out, Lisa.. she would want you to."_

The door opened and her son Michael stood between the door and the frame. He was much taller than her, blond just like Lisa had been, strong just like her husband. "_I want you to. I want to find him too_."

His mother shook with each word. The bastard who took Lisa had not only murdered his sister, but his mother and father as well. _"I'll talk to them._" He said and then closed the door.

The room was dark and music was blaring from the computer speakers where a slideshow of Lisa's pictures, of her memories replayed on auto for Michael to see. For it to feed his anger towards the man who took her life. She didn't deserve what she had gone through. She was innocent and good. She loved him, even when other people found it hard to. He looked at the image on the screen, his little sister kissing her ex boyfriend on the cheek, her first boyfriend and he shut the screen off. She was so young, and she only deserved the best, she could have had a long happy life, gotten married, had children. Loved them. Michael would find whoever ended Lisa's life and he would end theirs.

* * *

_"Quick Dexter! Hide me!"_ Masuka ran into my office, taking cover behind me as he watched the mail get delivered through the window, a package heading towards Debs office.

"_What's wrong?_"

"_Your sister. She's going to kill me! I accidentally ordered a subscription for SpankyTown Monthly, and it's addressed to the department! And now the lieutenant is going to get it and she's going to rip my balls off! Clean off! I just know it._"

"_You ordered it accidentally?_" That sounds nothing like him.

"_Well, no huhuhuhuh. That part was on purpose._" Of course. "_but the address was an accident. Oh shit!_"

Deb walked out of her office and scanned the area for Masuka, package in hand. Her eyes met his through the glass and she marched into my office.

"_What the hell is a SpankyTown Monthly?_" It sounded like more of a question than a threat.

"_It's a uhh.. um porn._" Masuka answered.

_"No shit. Here._" She handed him the package. "_Make sure I don't get it next month._"

Masuka looked surprise, and slowly reached for the package as if she would decide to change her mind and chop his hand off instead. Deb shook it for him to hurry up and take it and then looked my way and smiled.

_"That's it? 'Here?' No angry cursing? Or a threat to suspend me? Or maybe keep my magazine so you can fulfill your hot lady fantasies?"_

_"Good god, shut up."_ She laughed as she turned away to leave.

Masuka watched her leave in silence, a small smile forming on his face._"Someone's getting laid."_ He sing sung, loud enough for Deb to hear him and flick him off as she walked away, an added kick in her step. Masuka playfully slapped my shoulder and laughed, noticing the same change I had seen in Deb since that morning. She's happy.

Angel walked past Deb who greeted him with a high five and looked confused as he came in my office .

_"Deb seems chipper. New boyfriend?"_ Angel asked as Masuka flipped through his magazine.

_"Told ya."_ The smaller man replied.

_"Uh, not that I know of. Do you need something Angel?"_

_"Oh yeah, Perkins kid is coming in for interrogation. Mind getting his DNA when he comes in?"_

_"Sure thing."_

_"Also, Lisa's group counselor has decided to stop by. Says he was close to her, and that he'd love to help us catch whoever did such a horrible thing to her. I know he's just trying to help but you know, we should get his DNA por si las aguas... just in case."_

_"Yea, no problem."_

_"Aha! '10 signs of a woman in heat' #1 Incredibly upbeat attitude towards men."_ Masuka read out loud smiling at me. Angel looked at him and then down at the magazine.

_"What else does it say?"_

_"Guys, do you mind maybe reading outside?"_ I gestured towards my unfinished and unclassified blood samples.

_"Oh yeah." _The older detective said as he walked Masuka out of my office to continue their studies on the female species. Good luck to them.

* * *

The dramatics of the room excite me. I feel like I should be a little more nervous sitting here, but there's none of that, I'm just here to help.

First I would like to state that I loved little Lisa. She was great, one of the good ones you know? Now she'll always be that, a good little one. Never growing old, bitter and learned, of the shit that is this miserable world.

I play the role to perfection. My hands are wrung and every so often I look up at the hanging light of the interrogation room, feigning impatience. I spare one look at the double sided glass - She's there. I can feel her watching, judging. Debra Morgan, Lieutenant, sister, daughter. The one that got away. I can't help but smile. I've waited so long.

"_Mister Craig?_" Fuck. It's not her. "_I'm sergeant Batista, how are you doing?_" His grubby hand stretches out to greet me and I'm not hesitant to take it. I have to continue, I have to play the part.

_"I'm.. I'm ok Sargent. The lieutenant wont be joining us? I thought.."_

_"No no, she's interrogating the Perkins brother."_

_"Oh yes, Michael. Michael, I see_." This is not what I had planned, god damn it.

"_Yes. So I hear that you were close to miss Perkins. Do you think you know.._" The door opens again and though I'm hopeful I am again disappointed.

"Socio! Mister Craig, this is Dexter Morgan. He'll be taking your DNA, it's just a precautionary thing."

_"Sure thing, no problem."_

"_Hello!_" He greets, putting his tool kit down on the table. Dexter. Dexter Morgan. I remember you well.

"_I just need a cheek swab from you and I'm out of here._" He doesn't seem to remember me though. He's chipper. The bastard.

* * *

bzzzz bzzzzz

The phone buzzed again. 'New Message.' It was Anthony, the cheesy waiter from the other day. He had left his number on their tab and Jaime had probed and gushed over it as mom probably would've done if she were still alive. It was moments like these that Astor missed her the most. Grandma was horrible at dating advice. Anyways, he was pretty cute, this Anthony. She probably wouldn't have texted him had she not been desperate for some age appropriate conversation. Cody and Harrison's car and monster talk was really starting to drive her bananas, and Dexter and Aunt Deb had been talking non stop police case stuff. Whatever, he was sweet, she had actually been thinking about asking Dexter to let her and Cody stay longer. The week was going by so fast, and the possibility of maybe a new love interest that wasn't Jesse had even kept her awake last night. - Not that she'd be one to admit it. Astor looked over at Cody playing with Harrison and then made her way out of the room, she wouldn't be missed.

Anthony: Knock knock

Astor: Really?

Anthony: Knock Knock! Come on ;)

Astor: lol Who's there?

Anthony: Argg

Astor: Argg who?

Anthony: Argg you coming out with me or not?

Astor: lol Ur. Such. A. Loser.

Anthony: Is that a yes? :)

She could tell Jaime, but she would call Dexter and she didn't want to run the risk of him not letting her out. She wasn't a little girl anymore.

Astor: Wat time?

* * *

Sorry it's taken forever :|.. I **will** finish this so don't worry. There's 3 or 4 chapters left. Read carefully this is where it starts to get _messy_ ;)


	5. Memory

**Memory**

The night is cool and the eldest Bennet wraps her arms around herself as she watches the lit up full moon from Dexter's balcony. She had made it back, undetected. Dexter wasn't even home yet, but that was typical.

Miami. Home to four-hundred and eight thousand people. All driving around, running to and from places. Talking, eating, killing. A chill ran up her spine thinking about it, now that she was alone.

Anthony and her had walked down to the marina and hung out on some old guys boat that apparently Anthony kept an eye on while the man was back in Ohio or something. He'd stolen a bottle of wine from the restaurant and they had just lounged on the boat for a couple of hours, just watching the skyline, talking. She hadn't had any of the wine. She thought herself smarter than that, but she had enjoyed the conversation, gloomy as it may have turned out to be.

He talked about his mother, or what he remembered of her. She had died while giving birth to his sister, and neither had made it. His father had left them after his mom had notified him of her second pregnancy, and it was them and his uncle after that. And then just him and his uncle once his mother had passed.

She had looked up at the stars and felt just a little more blessed than poor Anthony. She remembered her mom very well, her soft voice, and warm smile, the smell of her perfume, and her shiny blond hair. Sometimes she would still hum Rita's old lullabies to herself when she had trouble sleeping, and as horrible as Paul had been to mom, he had still been a lovely father when he had tried. And she had Cody, and Harrison, and of course Dexter and aunt Deb, Grandma and Grandpa..

She seemed to have gotten lost in her thoughts because the next thing she realized was him wiping a tear from her cheek. It was odd, she was content, happy even - but, here she was again in Miami and she still missed mom.

Ever since she had turned fifteen, Rita's death had become something personal to her, she no longer wanted the pity of others, or an excuse for her actions, for her anger. the event was just, like a dark hole in her being that should have never been there. It was the moment she felt she became empty.

Something in the way Anthony touched her made her feel safe. It told her it was ok to tell him, to let him see it, because he seemed to be empty too. She told him of Rita's murder and he had looked into her and understood. The emptiness. He held her hand as the clouds parted to reveal a beautiful full moon. It was as if mom where looking down, and saying it was ok.

_ "My uncle used to tell me that, when people die they live in the state they lived in forever. Like, you will always remember your mom as this beautiful, happy woman. That is who she was. That she died such a terrible death doesn't take that away from her. She is who she was to the people who loved her. They're called innocents."_ he explained. _"My mom was an innocent, it was better that she die than that she live on in a world that would have only hurt her. "_

His attempt at comforting her made her feel uneasy, but his belief seemed to sooth him at least and she wasn't going to ruin that. She would have preferred that Rita live on, for all of them, but maybe that was selfish of her.

They had stayed in silence for a while, hands intertwined, looking at the shining moon before she had realized she had to get back. He had kissed her cheek at the gate, right before he walked off whistling some cheery song. Astor thought he was nice.

She caught herself whistling now, along with the wind. She caught herself smiling before the sudden jolt of a hand on her shoulder made her jump.

_"Astor? What are you doing up?"_

_"Dexter! Jesus Christ! You scared the shit out of me, mom used to hate it when you creeped around like that" _

_"Sorry." _

_"I was just getting some air, Jaime didn't say anything."_

_"Oh ok.. Are you ok?"_

She seemed serene before I walked up behind her. I hadn't meant to scare her. Force of habit I guess.

_"Yea, I was just thinking."_ Astor looked out to the sky again and my eyes followed. Full moon.

_"Alright, come in soon ok?"_ I saw her nod before I walked inside.

Jaime looked up from her spot near the sink to greet me. The place looked calm. A family lived here, a family that involved me. A serial killer. How long had it been since it had stopped being just me and my monster? Cody and Harrison's toys littered the floor, and Astor's magazines piled up on the coffee table, and they had only been here for two days? Strange as it was, it felt oddly satisfying to have them all here.

_"Hey, everyone's down for bed. Well, Cody is watching TV and Astor is out on the balcony, I got scared for a second that I'd lost her but then I looked out the window and there she was, all's good. Deb's not coming over tonight?"_ She noted, looking around me for the missing Morgan.

_"No, she had some work to finish up."_

_"Oh, I just thought, oh well never mind."_ She fidgeted with her bag strap for a moment as she got ready to go._"Will you be needing anything else tonight?"_

_"No, I think we're fine Jamie, thanks for staying late."_

_"Yea, no problem. Goodnight Dexter."_ She made her way out of the apartment leaving me in the tranquil silence of a sleeping apartment.

It had been a long day. Miami never disappoints in the murder department, but if it had been a long day for me the measly spatter analyst, it had been a much more overwhelming day for Miami metro's Lieutenant.

The city had wasted no time that morning, two new cases had been opened before noon, one gang related and the other a murder suicide between "friends" Ha.

Deb had appeared in my office some time around one, she needed a quick boost of confidence before facing her superiors for the monthly briefing. Her new boosts of confidence involved prolonged kissing and playful punches in the confined quarters of my locked office.

_"Least fucking favorite time of the month. No competition. You know, If I could choose between getting tased for an hour or sitting through one of these long ass meetings I'd pick two hours of tasing, gladly."_

_"That wouldn't be a fair trade off. Didn't you use to volunteer for tasing during your cop training?"_

_"It made me look tough."_ she smirked.

_"As nails."_

_"Fuck yes."_ She smiled and unwillingly dragged herself off my lap as she walked towards the door. _"Hopefully, I'll get to see you later. If not, want to do lunch at my place tomorrow?"_

_"Sure."_ She'd leaned in for a kiss, composed herself and had grunted out of the office. The meeting had gone on for four hours and I hadn't had the chance to see her before leaving.

On top of new cases and intensely long meetings, Michael Perkins had not showed up for questioning and the Perkins case investigation was extended further.

Her group counselor hadn't provided much information, but there was something about him, something familiar and I could swear I'd seen him from somewhere.

Harrison and Cody are sleeping soundly when I check in on them. They're pure innocence children. Not a care in the world. I look down at my son and the image of Lisa's blood drenched blond hair interrupts my gazing.

I had racked my brains all day and the case proved harder to me than any I've had before, and that's saying something. I must be loosing my touch. I searched the databases for any and all reputable child offenders who appeared to fill the profile. Living within the area, with access to the school, or Perkins home. One name popped up,Jeremy Anderson. Ex con. Did five years for kidnapping and neglecting his own daughter, I paid a visit to him after work hours, but despite a rather long and forceful interrogation I still came up empty.

_"What were you doing near Lisa Perkins school friday afternoon?"_ My grip on his arm tightened as it bent back behind him.

_"Fuck!"_ He yelled. His body pressed against the floor squirmed beneath my weight. _"I don't know who you're talking about! I don't know! I already said I don't know! Who are you?! Don't hurt me, I'll do whatever you want. Just let me ah- "_ I could feel his pulse race, his breath become labored. My face leaned in close to his ear, my identity sheltered by the darkness of the janitors closet I had lured him into.

_" I.. I .. I have a daughter man, a little girl. Have mercy! Don't you have kids?!"_

I sneered and he screamed as I pressed my weight on his displaced arm. _"I know about your little girl. I know that you took her from her mother. I know that you kept her in a dark room, forgetting to feed her, to care for her while you were out and about in a constant state of drunken stupor. You would have killed her. Like you did Lisa."_

_"Never! I woulda never, I love her! I don't even know who Lisa is! You gotta believe me!"_

_"Keeping someone against there will is not love."_

_"I haven't killed anyone! Please understand! What- "_ He had begun to cry and my rage against this horrible excuse for a man only pushed me to hurt him further. To inflict him with as much emotional pain as physical. He was wasting my time.

_"Lisa Perkins! Thirteen year old girl! You saw her Friday afternoon, after school! Tell me!"_ His bone popped off its socket and a scream ripped through him as he began to beg.

_"I don't know a Lisa! I wasn't at the school for her! I just wanted to see my daughter! I just wanted to see her."_

_"You leave her alone. She's better off without you."_

_"I can't! She's as much mine as she is her mothers. I can change, I have changed! I want her to love me too."_ I lifted my body off of him as he continued to cry, now disabled on the floor.

_"God, please don't hurt me."_ My foot made its way onto his shoulder as I pulled the dislocated arm with both hands. The bone set back into place with a pop and another ear shattering scream of his.

_"Stay away from your daughter or I'll be back."_

I didn't kill him. There was no need, he didn't fit the code, and he wasn't responsible for Lisa.

Water from the shower ran down my body and the tensions from the day washed off with them, all but one. One that I hadn't cared for for most of my adult life. A longing, that pulsated in my groin, the one that intensified with the memory of Deb's laughing, and the way her legs made their way through her silky bed sheets. I caved into my primal urges and satisfied my desire under the shower head but as I came, the longing intensified up to my chest, and I missed _her_ and the way her lashes brushed her cheeks when her eyes were closed and sleeping.

I turned the water off and reclined my forehead against the cool tile wall, panting as I regained my breath from the activity and the heat of the vapored room.

_I hadn't killed him._ And yet, how long had it been? A voice wondered within. The bloodlust hadn't surfaced in weeks, not since Deb had discovered my secret. I had been too busy convincing her that I'm still me. But the need. The inherent need wasn't there. The longing. The dark passenger had become dormant. That couldn't be it. The kids and Rita hadn't been able to stand between the dark passenger and a kill.

_"Maybe you've found your light Dexter."_ The familiar voice of my foster father echoed from the chair in the corner of the bedroom.

_"Impossible, Deb has never stopped it before, the kids have never.."_

_"You weren't in love."_

_"I'm not in love, that's insane. I just don't want to hurt her. This, this charade makes her happy."_

_"What charade Dexter?!"_ He mocked. _"You're just as involved in this as she is. Look at you! Since when have you longed for sex more than a kill? You're in love with your sister."_

I didn't answer my imaginary father but "shut up" came close to what I was thinking.

_"Where's the dark passenger Dexter? He's not here, he's not thirsty."_

_"He'll be back, I know it. Deb wont love me then."_

_"She loves you now."_ He sits down and I can feel his gaze peer into me. He watches me closely as I digest his words. _"but I do think you're right. She deserves better. You are not what I wanted for her."_

_"Of course she deserves better, but she's happy. I'm- "_

_"You don't need to say it. You don't even believe that yourself. You know you're no good for her._"

_"What would you have preferred? Someone like Quinn? Someone like you?"_

_"Well yes, actually. Someone who can offer her a life. You'll never marry her, give her a house, children? What can you give her Dexter? A lifetime of secrets? Of embarrassment?"_

_"You made me what I am. I am simply making the best of it."_

_"With my daughter!"_

_"She was never yours."_

I hear the door open and shut as Astor makes her way inside.

_"Goodnight Dexter!"_ She called out from the kitchen.

_"Goodnight."_ I said, more to the seething Harry Morgan staring down at me than to Astor on her way to bed.

* * *

The park is a beautiful place in the mornings. Early bird catches the worm right? St. Augustines sisters make their way across, amongst the children and the mothers, the friends and the joggers. Myself among them. I've grown quiet fond of this routine, Miami life hadn't been hard to get used to. My bones ache from last nights hard work, but it was necessary, and extremely satisfying. The life of an innocent freeze framed for the rest of time. My heartbeat raced as I sped towards the group of nuns on my way to some hardy morning coffee, all part of the routine of course. It's much easier with a purpose, with a goal in mind. Much easier than life before I left this place so long ago.

_"Sisters! You are all looking extra marvelous this morning. God must be blessing you all with the secret to the fountain of youth."_ I grinned at the batch of old women who blushed and giggled. They're so easy. So gullible at this age.

_"Tony, you scoundrel. You shouldn't say things like that, us poor vulnerable old bittys might believe you."_

_"And I pray you do sister Katherine. You especially."_ I whispered close to the oldest one of them. Old fool.

_"Such a charming boy."_ One of them said, as I jogged past them waving goodbye.

_"Ah! Mister Green, how are you doing this morning? Here for coffee?"_ The restaurant manager smiled my way.

_"Like every morning. Is Anthony in yet? Or did he sleep in again."_ Small talk with the city folk, part of the new life. Of the new plan.

_"Haha no no, he's in. I'll call him out for you."_

_"Thanks! make that two coffee's today please."_ The man nodded and walked back into the kitchen.

Anthony. I have still to decide wether he's a nuance to me or a gift from heaven. Sometimes the kid came in handy, but lately he's been questioning my motives and that isn't going to work well for my plans. He'll have to prove himself to me by the end of the week, I'll see what becomes of him after that.

_"Hey uncle T. Here two coffees. Part two today?"_

_"Yes, part two. I'm exited I can feel my blood pumping already."_ My hands came together with sheer joy as I felt all my plans finally take shape into fruition.

_"I'm glad all's coming together for you T."_

_"Yes, me too. Speaking of which, have you decided who you'll be freeing yet?_

_"Ah-huh."_

_"You don't sound sure."_

_"N-No I will be, don't worry."_

_"Alright, wish me luck."_

_"Good luck T, you deserve it."_

_"I know I do my boy, it's been long time coming this plan."_ Two coffees in hand I make my way to my destiny, at Miami metros police department.

* * *

_"Go 'Ahhh'"_ Michael Perkins opened wide and I swabbed the DNA off the side of his cheek. _"That's it, the St. Batista will be in to question you shortly Michael."_ He didn't respond, just diddled with his fingers on the table. _"You know, things will move a lot faster if you cooperate, we want to help."_ The boy exhaled and he relaxed onto the chair.

_"I just don't know how that's possible you know? It's been almost a week, and nothing is going to change what happened. Or make it better. I couldn't come in yesterday."_ He pulled a piece of paper out of his pocket and handed it to me. _"I was writing her eulogy, its her funeral tomorrow. I just want it to be perfect."_

_"You want me to read it?"_

_"Lt. Morgan, she's your sister right? You know what it feels like, you'd understand. If it was you writing her eulogy, would it say what mine does."_

My breath hitched. _"Well if you put it that way. 'There will never be a better sister than Lisa."_ I read out loud.

_"I was only three when she was born, but she lit up my life. I had a friend, when I had none before. The way she cared for others was unconditional, the dreams she had infinite. She had the idea that we would grow old together, she used to take my hand in hers and read it and say that I have the biggest heart line she's ever seen. I never saw that heart line, but because she saw it, it was true. The light that burned out when my sister was brutally murdered will never be replaced in my heart, the heart she saw. Every part of me feels dark now, it's all consuming and strange, but it's the void that has been left.."_

_"She wouldn't have liked to hear that part."_ I said intuitively. _"The best way to keep her alive would be to honor her memory of you, if she believed you have a heart then you should live like you have one, and fight the darkness."_ My stare was fixed on no particular point and the words leaving my mouth felt foreign to me. I'm not one to follow my own advice.

_"Cooperate Michael."_ With that I walked out of the interrogation room and into my lieutenants office.

* * *

Deb was elbows deep in paperwork when I walked in, her head in her hands in sign of exasperation.

_"Lunch?"_ I asked locking the door. Her head dropped and hit the pile of papers and she released a soft moan.

_"I don't think I can."_ She pouted and shuffled papers around, paying full attention to her work. I walked around the desk and looked down at the papers. The death count for the month was high, the cases solved low. I massaged her tense shoulders with my hands and made my way around her neck. She unwound like a purring cat and allowed herself the relaxation. She tilted her head back exposing her neck to me and I couldn't resist putting my lips on it.

Debs eyes opened wide and she smiled. She liked this new attentive Dexter, she didn't think she was capable of loving him more, and it scared her that she seemed to be able to. Her hands reached back and dug their way through his hair. His lips searched for hers and they lingered there.

_"I love you"_ she whispered onto his lips. He looked at her and then his lips kissed her forehead.

_"Let's go eat. You can spare an hour, come on."_ He pulled her on her feet. _"I'll help you close some cases tonight."_

_"You'll do that?!"_ She asked, thankful for the very much needed help. Especially from Dex. He was the best detective she knew, his talents were definitely wasted in blood spatter. Not that he wasn't insanely amazing at that too, but she was beginning to believe there was nothing he wasn't good at.

_"Yes, now come on. Food!"_ I held her hand in mine up to when we opened the door. Past open doors we were just the Morgans.

_"Lieutenant Morgan!"_ The group counselor from yesterday called out once we stepped out of Debs office. He was tall and gave off an air of confidence in his fitted running T-shirt and shorts.

_"Yes?"_ Deb asked as he came closer towards us. He looked happy, almost chipper to see her. Where do I know you from?

_"Well look at you!"_ And he did, he looked her up and down and a strange possessiveness washed over me as he took in all of her. Deb looked uncomfortable and she was milliseconds away from a curse riddled greeting. _"Sorry, Tony Green."_ His hand reached out to take hers but he had a coffee in it. _"For you."_ Deb took the drink and shook the hand, still confused. _"I can't believe you don't recognize me! Debra Morgan, little Debbie. Oh, the one that got away!"_ his now unoccupied hand came down to hold her chin. He smiled at her lips as though he remembered them. I remembered him.

_"Wow there buddy! No one's called me little Debbie since I was like ten. Tony Green?"_

_"Tony Green."_ I explained. My hand reached across and shook his, making space between him and Deb. _"I remember you, eighty four, right?! Deb's first boyfriend."_ He firmly held my hand and stared me down with a big grin fake enough for the both of us.

_"Ta-t-tony?! No! Haha!"_ She laughed and jumped in to hug him. _"You had a stutter then! Oh my god, how are you?"_

_"Haha yea, ta-t-tony, It's just Tony now, or . Eighty four was it? Good memory! David?"_

_"Dexter"_ Debra corrected. _"You've gotta be shitting me if you don't remember Dexter." _

_"Oh no, I remember Dexter. You would chatter away about him for hours, I guess the name just escaped me."_ Deb seemed to blush at the innocent mention of her childhood ramblings. She still fell victim to them sometimes. Her mouth had always been her one true downfall. _"Look at you two now, Lieutenant and head blood spatter analyst. I'm sure Harry is proud."_ Deb's gaze bounced from me to the floor, ever the one to wear her heart on her sleeve.

_"I'm sure he is."_ I answered for the both of us. _"He passed years back. Sorry to cut it short Tony, but we were on our way out."_

_"Oh yeah, sorry, sorry. Busy cops and all. I feel like I wasn't of much help to you guys yesterday and I really want to be able to help out with Lisa's case. I used to volunteer at the Ohio state Police Department a few years back and I'd like to use my skills to help in any way."_ Deb smiled, cupping the coffee offering with both hands.

_"Tony coming in yesterday was of great help already. I'm sure that if you leave your number with St. Batista we'll call you if-"_

_"I did that, and see I don't feel like that's enough."_

_"Your persistence is appreciated-"_

_"Morgan."_ Quinn's voice called from his desk. Deb and I both turned.

_"See, now that's cool."_ Green commented with giddy excitement.

_"Well both of you, I hope you weren't thinking of going anywhere. Dispatch called. Another girl murder, the X guy, 'ere boss"_ He handed Deb the dispatch note with the information.

_"Oh fuck. Great."_ I heard her mumble,_ "Dex, blood."_

_"Yeah."_ I gestured my leave at Tony and moved to get my kit.

* * *

_"Hey Deb!"_ Tony followed Deb towards her office. _"Look, I know this is probably the worse time but. Is there anyway we could, you know. Catch up?"_

_"Uf, yea bad timing Tony. Another day?"_ She walked around her desk and pulled her heels off, slipping on a pair of jeans and sliding the fitted pencil skirt over them. It was kind of titillating. To be that fabric running over her skin.

_"Can I come?"_

_"What?"_ She looked stunned.

_"To the scene? I mean if it's this X guy, maybe I can help. Please let me try Deb. That little girl was a friend of mine. I knew her, she."_ I moved in closer and took her hand in mine pressing it to my chest. _"She trusted me, and I feel like I owe her to find out."_

_"I guess. Fuck, it won't be pretty. I can't have you throwing up all over the crime scene."_

_"I wont, I promise, just. Please."_ I was holding her hands to my chin now. I could read her like a book, she would say yes, and I'd come along. Oh Debra Morgan the years I've waited for this.

_"Fine!"_ My lips kissed her knuckles and when I looked up to gauge her reaction. Her attention had left me.

_"Ready?"_ Dexter asked from the doorframe kit in hand.

_"Um, yeah. Tony is coming along."_

"Ok." He answered, leaving the room.

Here we go.

* * *

Ask and you shall receive. **3** to go. I'll try to put them up weekly [don't take my word for it] so that it can end when season 8 begins. Leave your comments, I want to know if you guys can tell where I am going with this. It's also an incredible motivator. Everybody thank Zerousy, DA-GD FAN and Willwood Rose for their resent inquiering on when I would continue this.


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